conflict | aholeinthistown

This is karma.

Wrong people, wrong feelings. If only I could rearrange all these. If only. If.

I am feeling really awkward right now because this man is servicing the air-conditioner 2 metres away from me and I’m blogging and tumblring and before he entered I was looking at this tumblr that I just found (I’m WARNING you that it might be disturbing for you.). I myself am quite scarred, to be honest. Not being judgmental or anything, but uh, I would personally prefer something more mainstream when it comes to things like this.

I need new music.

Barbara is the goddess.

Awkward moment when people (read: Celina A.K.) tell you that they stalk your blog. Hello, by the way. 😉 Thanks for sending me such a hot photo of myself. What a shame you didn’t save it for 10 years later when I’m successful in life to blackmail me. Like Alvin Tan.

I am feeling so insecure this is ridiculous. Leave me alone.

The good are never easy; The easy, never good.

Chorus to King And Lionheart was stuck in my head throughout HCL P2. That was 2 hours of

“Howling ghosts they reappear
In mountains that are stacked with fear
But you’re a king and I’m a lionheart
A lionheart”

for me. Fantabulous.

Still looking at GPC and at the verge of throwing up.

I’m sleepy and I’m tired and I’m sorry but I honestly have no idea what the fuck have I done. Like, I don’t understand why you are trying (or at least I feel like you are, but that’s fine) to make me feel bad right now because I never said shit about breaking up or patching up and am I supposed to be at fault? I don’t fucking understand. Well I’m so sorry I “tickled [your] back”. I vaguely recall a conversation about it not being able to make it through New Year and I thought that we mutually agreed that we would understand. Yeah, go ahead and make it all my fault like I’m the heartless one because it is obviously not okay to move on. Go ahead and hate me all you want because I guess it is really for your good, and I’m genuine about this.

As you can see, I’m just terribly terrible to people that are nice to me so world, please be mean to me. Crush me and fuck me over and I’d be drooling over you begging for more.

This is a cycle: me and people.

I miss mike so motherfucking much. 😥 I’m so sorry I was so terrible. If only you could read. I love you okay I’m sorry I didn’t change your beddings often enough, feed you better food, get you a better home, play with you more often… I am so sad now it’s ridiculous.