First day of CNY and I’m just here staring at my MBP and finding things to do on the computer. Currently boosting Sherman’s ego over twitter but to be honest, he’s really kind of hot now I feel like a mommy watching an emo boy grow up :’)
Anyhow, I’m listening to Bon Iver and being sad over people (that I never thought would walk out of my life) walking out of my life. 😦 I am so fucking insecure I get these anxiety attacks when people stop talking to me because I’d think that they hate me but I wouldn’t be able to decide because they might be secretly hating on me thinking that I am an annoying bitch but still act like they like me so maybe they have an ulterior motive that I would never know so if I end up trusting them my life is going to be over because then they would manipulate my trust and trample over my mind with lies and I’d be so devastated because everybody knows that being stabbed in the back by people you trust is the worst thing that can ever happen to you. I can’t. Not again.
You said you’d be there. You left.